Chair jokes
How do you end an argument with an emo? Kick the chair.
When's the best day to get the chair? Fry-day.
If you can't stand the heat, sit!
A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair.
The man who controls the chair asks for any last words.
The prisoner replies with: “Can you hold my hand?”
Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?
I told him to be a stand-up comedian!
When a person in a wheelchair says, "You've never taken a step in my shoes," and you say, "To be honest, you haven't either."
A guy walks into a bar, then a table, and then a chair.
What do you call a chair with a hat?
I don't know; the real question is, why was the chair wearing a hat?
What do you call a chair?
I don't know. What?
Oh, hi, Chairity!
Q: Get up for a chair joke!
A: Oh, never mind, you can sit down.
Yes.
One day, I sit in the lounge on a chair.
My friend that was in a wheelchair was getting bullied, so I said, "Stand up for yourself."
*Me walking into the nail salon* Hi, I'm here for my 3:45 appointment.
*Nail tech:* Ok, sweety, come and sit down.
*Me sits down in the chair*
*Nail tech:* You want long nail, short nail? Um, long nail. You want boyfriend?!! Yes, ma'am. Ok, let me work magic. Ok.
*gives me short nail* Bro, I asked for long nail, but you said BF, but u look lesbian.
*walks out without paying*
*Nail tech gives money to a customer* There u win.
*customer:* I told u she would.
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
I broke up with my boyfriend and stole his wheelchair.
Guess who came crawling back?
I can't decide if I like rocking chairs or not.
I keep going back and forth on them.
My friend just got hit by a car and is now in a wheelchair. He is getting bullied, but I don’t understand why he just can’t stand up for himself.
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
How would Steven Hawking's mom punish him as a kid?
Power off his chair.