Catch jokes

A man got pulled over, and the policeman had stepped out and said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

The man said, "I was trying to catch up with the traffic."

The officer said, "There is no traffic."

The man said, "Exactly, that’s how far behind I am!"

Why don't orphans play tag?

Because there's no one to catch.

Which tower is better at playing catch? The south tower, obviously. It caught 2!

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

"Is your refiger running?"

"Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it!"

Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?

He didn't know where home was.

I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.

Why did the dog cross the road twice?

Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.

What can you catch but not throw?

A cold!

Nah, did your barber catch a seizure while lining you up?

A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.

He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"

What is the best way to catch a baby from falling off the roof?

With a pitchfork.

"What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!"

Let's hope the new tower doesn't go plane watching like the old ones.

North Tower: "Hey, South Tower, we can talk later; I gotta catch a plane!"

I caught a cold, Mary Earp caught the ball, what did the towers catch? The plane.

Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.

Your hairline is so long that Odell Beckham Jr. missed a catch and saw your hairline from a mile away!

Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?

'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.

Once, an orphan purposely fell out of a tree. He forgot his parents wouldn't catch him.

Dads are boomerangs, I hope.