Catch jokes

I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.

So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.

What did the angler say to his students at the end of his fishing class?

Catch you later!

"Is your refiger running?"

"Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it!"

What do you call a chicken that catches ghosts? A poultrygeist.

Why are blind people bad at catching things? Because they never see it coming.

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

Yo mama so stupid, she joined the Squid Game as a sea life lover because she thought it was a game of whoever catches the most octopuses wins.

Why did Marxism never catch on in England?

Because then it would be impossible to get proper tea.

Nah, did your barber catch a seizure while lining you up?

A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.

He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"

What is the best way to catch a baby from falling off the roof?

With a pitchfork.

"What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!"

I caught a cold, Mary Earp caught the ball, what did the towers catch? The plane.

Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.

Once, an orphan purposely fell out of a tree. He forgot his parents wouldn't catch him.

Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?

'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.

Dads are boomerangs, I hope.

Your hairline is so long that Odell Beckham Jr. missed a catch and saw your hairline from a mile away!

"I'm the big man, catching the kids in my big van." - Ben 2021