Carpentry jokes
What's the difference between a hooker and Jesus?
Their face when you nail them!
Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?
He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture frame?
It only took one nail to hang the picture frame.
Memes
It could be if you believe
What do you call a bad piece of wood? Knotty.
Q: How many dogs does it take to shingle a roof? A: It depends on how you cut 'em.
What happened when a hammer punished the nail?
He hit him.
Why did the rapper become a carpenter?
To NAIL his performances!
How do you close a cabinet?
You closet! Hahahhyaahhahaaahhahaha!
What’s the difference between Jesus and a plank of wood?
A plank of wood can take nails to the extremities without screaming.
"When I was a child, my blind mother taught me hand jobs, like carpentry and painting with her legs."
Community
Well let me have a ruler and a saw and a board and I'll cut it