Cant jokes
What did the cow say to his relatives on Christmas day?
Moorry Christmas!
(Even though cows can't really have religions.)
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
Why can't we see or sense kamikazes' bombs?
They're out of plane sight.
Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even fit in the suitcase.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why do orphans suck at baseball?
Because they can't run home.
Coach: Why can't orphans play baseball?
Me: Because they can't get a homerun.
Why can't orphans play soccer? Because they can't practice with their dad.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They have no home to run to.
I'm throwing an orgy for people on antidepressants.
Let me know if you can't cum.
Why can’t orphans go on school trips?
Parent's signature: _________
Q: What do you call an owner that can't take care of their cat? A: A impurrefect owner.
Why did the knight cross the road?
He can't because his armor was too heavy.
Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied?
'Cause they can’t stand up for themselves.
What’s one store an orphan can’t shop at?
HomeGoods ;)
If you punch an orphan, they can't do anything; they can't tell their parents.
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
Why can't an orphan go to college?
He needs a parent signature.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"
Why can't he say that?
Answer: He works at an orphanage.