Cant jokes

Mia: I'm pregnant again, Paul. I can't wait for you to come home.

Paul: I got a tree to hit on the way.

Why can't you teach an orphan new tricks?

Because there is no one to teach them.

Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?

Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.

Why can’t organs have a family bag of chips?

Because they have no family to share it with.

Why do a woman like to have sex with the lights off?

They can't stand to see a man have a good time.

Great news for all Star Wars fans who can't wait until the next movie!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoMlJbLJHcg

When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.

Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!

Why can't Chinese people play baseball?

They eat the bat.

Why can’t Helen Keller drive?

It’s because she’s dead.

Why can’t orphans go to a field trip?

Parent signature: _________

"G.I. Jane 2, can't wait to see it!"

What do an orphan and a blind person have in common? They both can't see their parents.

Kid: You're so fat!

Other kid: At least fat can be changed, but your ugly face can't be.

Why can't an orphan go on a field trip?

'Cause they need parent registration!

Me: I just shot an orphan.

Mate: You can’t do that!

Me: What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.

Why can’t orphans have sex, my friends? Why? They have none to call daddy.

Why can't blind people fish?

Because it was "see food."

What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?

Perform fellatio.

Why can't orphans have sex?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."