Cant jokes
Jesse: Do you like my ball?
Mike: Yes, they are very big. I can’t even fit them in my mouth. You bought a new ball, right?
Jesse: No, they do not leave me.
What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!
Not funny, here’s another.
Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.
Why do transgender people have high rates of suicide?
Because they can't accept themselves for who they are, but they want everyone else to accept them.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
Why is the orphan failing all his classes? He can't do homework.
Good being
Why can't humans hear a dog whistle? -- Because dogs can't whistle.
Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?
Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
What's bald and can't grow no hair?
A kid with cancer.
Stop making jokes about people in wheelchairs. They can't stand up for themselves.
Why don’t orphans and Chinese kids play baseball. The orphans can’t find home and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
Q: Why can’t orphans play baseball?
A: They don’t have a home to run back to.
You other brothers can’t deny that she’s fly.
Why can’t orphans tell jokes?
Because their parents can’t *bear* the *jeans* because they don’t have any.
Luckily for you, mirrors can't talk, and luckily for you, they can't laugh either.
I've got not much of anything to be honest.
Been in special classes in school.
Not liked by people.
Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me.
31 years old and never had sex, pathetic.
Not very smart.
Don't look good.
Hate myself more than anything.
Been a failure at everything in life.
Probably be alone forever.
People treat me like crap.
Can't do anything right.
And the list goes on and on.
So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet? The answer is, I forget. I'm a extreme procrastinator, keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway.
Orphan, why can’t I watch a PG movie?
Because they are Parental Guidance.
Q: Why can't orphans be on a football team?
A: Because they won't know where to go on a home game.
Son: Dad, I had sex for the first time.
Dad: Would you like to talk about it?
Son: Sure.
Dad: Sit down and let's talk about it.
Son: I can't, my butt hurts.
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.