Cant jokes

Monkey: What ya doing?

Other monkey: Just you know, "hanging around."

Bad joke, right? I just can't think of something amazing. It's like my brain is "hanging."

Stephen Hawking isn't dead, he's just can't walk to the shop and get new batteries. 🙄

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  • A woman wakes up in a hospital after an accident and yells, "Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs!"

    And the doctor says, "I know, I amputated your arms."

    A son walks up to his dad and says, "Dad! I just had sex for the first time."

    The dad goes, "Great! Wanna sit down and talk about it?"

    The son says, "I can't sit right now, my butt is very sore."

    You want to hear a joke about pizza?

    Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!

    Knock knock.

    Boo.

    No need to cry, it was only a joke. Yeh, I can't think of anything.

    A mushroom walked into a pub.

    He asked the bartender to give him a beer.

    The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."

    The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"

    If Stephen Hawking was in a horror movie, would he make his robot try and shout, "Aaaaaaaah! Help me, I can't move! I'm too scared!"?

    By the way, could you tell me an elevator pun? I can't seem to "come up" with one myself.