Cant jokes
What's the best thing about beating up orphans?
They can't tell their parents.
I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin', doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom You know we straight with doin' your mom I like your mama's big butt, and I cannot lie. You other brothers can’t deny that she’s fly. We make sexy time, yes and every night I tap that. She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I’m half black. But your moms the best, the super M.I.L.F. Cause she loves to toss the salad even though she ain’t a chef And I blame it on the al-al-al-cohol But if I were you, I wouldn’t kiss your mom on the mouth at all. She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed. She likes rough sex with handcuffs and I’ll be honest She likes me to Chris Brown her when she acts like Rihanna. She’s so therapeutic. When I need to cure my restlessness I br-br-br-br-br-br-br-br motorboat your moms breastestess. I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song Cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mo-om.
Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin', doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom You know we straight with doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin', doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom You know we straight with doin' your mom
I’m havin' sex with your mother That makes me better than you. I’m havin' sex with your mother That makes me better than you.
Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin', doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom You know we straight with doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom Doin', doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom You know we straight with doin' your mom
I can't stop thinking about those beans.
What is long, yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
You other brothers can’t deny that she’s fly.
There is a man in the hospital. The power went out, and the man was stabbed to death. There are three witnesses: the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who who was at the vending machine. Who killed the man?
The mom did, because you can’t use a vending machine when the power's out!
What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.
Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Because they are parental guidance.
If you cut off your head, you can't breathe.
You also can't breathe if you die.
So why isn't it debreathiation?
Say what you will of pedophiles, but you can't ignore their problem with immature ejaculation.
Have you ever met a kid who’s so fat that they can’t even be accepted to “My 600lb Life”? They need a higher-ranking one!
Someone eats glue and tells the other, "Sorry, can't stick around!"
I have been reading this book about zero gravity. I can’t seem to put it down.
Why can’t you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn’t born yesterday...
Why can’t you ever trick an aborted baby?
Because it wasn’t born yesterday. 🤭
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent.
So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.