How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
Why did the student cannibal rush to the cafeteria?
He wanted to eat ahead of the others.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
What does a cannibal ask for when leaving a restaurant?
"Can I have a bodybag?"
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
Why would a cannibal stop eating people?
if they got fed up with them.
Three guys landed on a cannibal island. The cannibal chef told them if they wanted to live, they had to go get 10 of one fruit and bring it to him, and he would tell them what to do.
So the first guy brings 10 apples, and the chef said if he could shove all 10 of those in his ass without making a sound, he could live. He was three apples in and made a sound, and they ate him. The second guy brought grapes; nine grapes in, and he burst out laughing. The cannibals ate him. Then the first guy said, "Why'd you laugh? You were almost there!" The other guy who had the grapes said, "I couldn't help it, I was told the third guy came back with 10 pineapples."
Vegetarian: I prefer plants.
Herbivore: I just like food.
Cannibal: I'm a people person.
What is a cannibals favourite place to go? An orphanage, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
I fed some chickens some eggs. They ate them. Nothing else to explain except they are cannibals.
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.