Call jokes
What do you call a Communist sniper? -- A Marxman.
The furniture store keeps calling me back... But all I wanted was that one nightstand.
If Al Gore started a math rock band, it should be called Algorhythm.
After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"
God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."
"Son, I found a condom in your room."
"Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"
"Why are you calling me Grandpa?"
"Because I couldn't find it yesterday."
What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? -- Canned food.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? -- Meals on wheels.
What do you call disabled people in a hot tub? -- Vegetable soup.
Yo mama is so unfamiliar with the gym, she calls it James.
What do you call an octopus that fights sharks?
An octobrave.
What is a gathering of octopuses called?
Octoposse.
How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex?
Call her on the phone.
What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?
A baked potato.
What do you call a Jamaican proctologist?
Pokémon!
What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?
A pap smear.
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.
What do you call a vegetable who has escaped prison?
An escapea.
What do you call it when you're trying to find out what someone had for lunch?
An ingestigation.
What do you call a fat psychic?
A four-chin teller.