My last relationship ended because my ex girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset, to be honest I didn't like her anyway, she kept telling me I never listen, or something like that
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
My girlfriend sent “a let’s break up text” right when I was done editing our pics 😮💨
What did Michael Jackson say before he broke up with Billie Jean? Billie Jean is not my lover.
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
So, my girlfriend left me. I took her wheelchair, and she came back crawling.
My girlfriend left me for spending my own money. I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff, but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute, she leaves me.
My ex.
Oooh, I fall apart. Oooh, yeah, mmhmm. She told me that I'm not enough, yeah, And she left me with a broken heart, yeah. She fooled me twice and it's all my fault, yeah. She cut too deep, now she left me scarred, yeah. Now there's too many thoughts goin' through my brain, yeah, And now I'm takin' these shots like it's Novocaine, yeah. Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Never caught a feelin' this hard Harder than the liquor I pour Tell me you don't want me no more But I can't let go Everybody told me so Feelin' like I sold my soul Devil in the form of a whore Devil in the form of a whore You said it No, you said it No, you said it We'd be together Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Ice keep pourin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' Covered in scars and I can't help showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin' Ice keep droppin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' All these scars, can't help from showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin', yeah Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought.
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I?
I broke up with my emo girlfriend yesterday, look who came crawling back!
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.
When your so rich that you can buy anything you end up getting a cow in your living room yeah anyways my ex is still in my living room
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
An orphan girl's boyfriend broke up with her, what was his reason?
"If her parents didn't want her, why should I?"
i broke up with my boyfriend and stole his wheel chair.
guess who came crawling back.
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
Why’s it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl? You gotta drop the bomb twice.
Babe, I'm breaking up with you.
Why? I'm turning 18 tomorrow.
what makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar? They can't stand up for themselves.
