Blue jokes
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, How many bananas can I fit, Maybe two?
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Everything is black, I can't see, can you?
How old is a blue plane?
Blue.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You think violets are blue, what the hell is wrong with you?
Some people call them glue sticks, but they're blue sticks.
"You look like Barney, I'm choking you too, and your face is turning all purple and blue!"
Blueface baby!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Two gay lovers find out they are brothers.
How do you make a pink Smurf?
You peel the skin off.
What is blue and wiggling on my floor?
A baby in a bag.
Am I the only one who gives people in the neighborhood names they don't know they have? Like "Blue truck dude", "Loud dog guy", "Nice old lady with the rose bushes", "That slut across the street."
How do you knockout an unorthodox blue tooth?
You get a good connection.
What's black, blue, and red, laying in a ditch?
You after you disrespect me.
What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs?
A paintball.
A man is with his friend in a bar.
The friend, out of the blue, asks, "Hey, what's your body count?"
Nervous, the man looks away.
The friend then says, "I'm talking about sex."
The man then turns back and mumbles, "Oh... I thought you saw inside the basement..."
"Wait, wha..."
"What?"
What is red, white, and blue and makes me proud to live in this country?
The baby in the corner I choked, stabbed, and then came on.
Q. What color were Mohammed Atta’s eyes?
A. Blue, one blue this way and one blue the other way.
Roses are red, your penis is blue, the bed sheet has turned a different color, too.
Okay, roses are red, violets are blue, Barney looks better than you.