What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl? The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhoea when you pull your meat out
how do you make an orphans hands bleed make it clap until it's parents come home
why did the bat cross the road because to get blood bar
roses are red my blood is too i see a lot when i lost u
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile? Getting the blood out of your clown suit
Little Johnny's sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, "That is my garage". The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, "What is that between your legs?" Her dad answers, "It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy's garage." The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, "Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?" Suzy says, " Well... little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."
What has two legs and bleeds? Half a cat
3 vampires walk into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The second orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender turns to the third and asks “a Bloody Mary?”
The vampire shakes his head. “Hot water for me”
“Hot water?”
“I found a tampon out back and want to make tea”
Today, I operated on a little girl, she needed O- negative blood. We didn’t have any, but her twin sister has O- negative blood. I explained to her that it was a matter of life and death. She sat quietly for a moment, and then said goodbye to her parents. I didn’t think anything of it until after we took her blood and she asked, “so when will I die”? she thought she was going to give her life for her sister. Thankfully they both died.
Did you know all Canadians have the same blood type?
They all have blood "eh"
There was a man he came home with his friends from the bar and man; was he ever wasted. Their friends made sure to get him home safely the next morning he woke up and found blood all over his night stand he called his friends and asked for his alarm clock back.
orphan: im an orphan Technoblade: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood off her son’s cock!
I was gardening and found a chest full of blood... i forgot i was in the cemetery
An attractive man and a blonde meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $30." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman slightly annoyed gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she mumbles with her mouth full.
Roses are red... blood is too... I wonder how... blood would look on you.
I got two cups of milk. One for me and one for my son. We both drank them at the same time, and tried not to puke. I won, since my son is face first on the table with his blood all over.
My little league football debut was a lot like the first time I had sex. I was beaten, bruised, and bloody, but at least my Dad came.
Roses are red So is My gun Why do you ask? Because it's full of blood
The Britain’s walk in the house of the alcoholic grandad they ask Mary the mum why she had blood all over her and she said someone dropped the butter they walked into the living room and Thomas was dead on the floor
