Black jokes
What's the difference between a black person and an apple?
An apple chooses to hang.
What's the difference between an apple and a black man?
Apples look better hanging on a tree.
What do you call a skinny black dick? A Tootsie Roll.
What does BLM stand for?
Black Lust Matters.
What does a woman call Stormzy in bed?
Stiff chocolate.
What is black and blue and really hates sex?
The six-year-old in my basement.
A girl had black hair. Also, I threw rubbish at her to realize she wasn't a bin.
The other day, me and my friend were at the shops buying crafts. I was wearing a black top; she was wearing a stripy top. We were arguing about who was more creative when she asked me to prove that I am. I just said, "You buy your stripes, I make mine."
What is black, white, and red all over?
My third wife.
Everything is so racist these days, you can't even say "black paint" anymore. You now have to say "Tyrone can you please paint that wall?"
The teacher asked the class what sound does a cow make? "Mooo," said Sally. "Good job," said the teacher. "What sound does a sheep make?" "Baa," said Jack. "Good, now what sound does a pig make?" Little Johnny raised his hand really high in the sky. The teacher called on him. He said, "The pig says, 'Get on the ground and put your hands on your head, you black motherfucker.'"
Why do black people only have nightmares?
Because the last one that had a dream got shot.
Why is Black Panther every cop's worst nightmare?
He is a bulletproof black man.
Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same.
Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.
What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.
What's all fuzzy, warm, and laughing? The person who snapped its neck and put it into the blender.
How many police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just beat the room for being black.
Roses are red, Burnt bodies are black.
You'd look great With a knife in your back.
People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.
A black man entered a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.
The bartender says, "That looks exotic, where’d you get it?"
"Africa," the parrot responded.
My black friend told me to stop making racist jokes...
...I told him to lighten up.