Bird jokes
Hi, I did not get it when I went home to walk home from home and walk, walk, walk.
It’s a bird.
It’s a plane.
Oh, shit it is a plane!
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
What do you call seagulls that fly over a bay? Bay-gulls.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to Birds Eye.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Who who, I'm an owl.
Why do birds fly upside down over Poland?
There's nothing worth shitting on.
What do birds and autistic people have in common?
They both flap their arms.
My dad told me a story today. His mom, my grandma, said if a bird gets in your house, someone will die.
That day, a hummingbird got in his UPS truck, and that’s the day he found out that my grandma had cancer. 😭😭😭😭😭 6 weeks later, she died. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
What do you call a fat duck?
Donald Duck.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
What did the bird go to the hospital for?
For tweetment!
All countries will get Covid.
Except China, they got it right off the bat.
Why did the researchers want all the shore birds high on marijuana? They wanted to leave no tern unstoned.
What is the difference between a tree and a school?
A school is for kids, and a tree is for birds.
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:
"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."
Anyone know what bird that is?
A baby penguin sat on an iceberg. The baby penguin watched the Titanic sink.
Why didn’t the turkey cross the road? To prove that he was not chicken.
What did the bird say to the other bird?
Nothing, because birds can't talk.