Bird

Bird jokes

Chirp

Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:

"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."

Anyone know what bird that is?

Titanic

A baby penguin sat on an iceberg. The baby penguin watched the Titanic sink.

Duck

Hello! Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken!

Teacher

Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?

Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.

Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.

5 minutes later

Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?

Teacher, the one sucking it?

Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.

Wind

What do you get when you cross a cold wind with a feather?

A brrrrrrrr-d!

Duck

Why do ducks have feathers?

So you don't see their butt. *quack* (crack)

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  • Owl

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Who.

    Who who are you? Are you an owl or something?

    Hospital

    I went to the mental hospital. I asked one of the kid what its favorite animal was. They said a bird. I asked for a reason. It's because they both jump off roofs.

    Duck

    Why can’t baby ducks lay eggs? Because their quacks are too small.