Why am I so fat? When I was younger my mother said I should be the bigger person.
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
When Mother Teresa went to heaven, she was greeted by Saint Peter with a halo for her dedication to the needy. After walking around for a while, she saw Lady Diana with a bigger halo. She got angry at Lady Diana and went to Saint Peter and asked him why she had a bigger one, and Saint Peter said, "Oh, that’s not a halo, that’s a steering wheel."
Ex-Boyfriend: You have no ass, so we're through!
Me: Stop being a dickhead, dude!! It ain't gonna make your little sausage any bigger!
Bro, your toenails are bigger than your IQ.
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
What’s a zebra? A few sizes bigger than an A.
Why’s BBC called BBC?
The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-
I wondered as the rock in the sky got bigger and bigger, then it hit the bottom of the Earth, and... "explosion!"
Why is my dick like a balloon?
The more you blow it, the bigger it gets.
What to gift a child molester who already has everything? A bigger county with more believers.
Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!
A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says, "What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?" The boy cries.
Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says, "You gonna tell your mom?", the little boy says, "Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over."
I wonder why the plane got bigger and bigger then it hit me
Brinnia so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said, "I need a bigger one."
I couldn’t figure out why the football kept getting bigger...then it hit me
Basketballs are bigger than end.
"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."
Your mom is so fat that when she saw Moby Dick, she said, "We are family... even though you're bigger than me."
