Biden jokes
President Biden ordered an F16 missile attack to destroy the Chinese spy balloon.
Americans are thrilled. It's the first thing he's done to combat inflation.
Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?
He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.
What's the difference between your mom in bed and Biden in the presidential race?
Your mom finishes.
Hello my fellow Americans, I'm playing Clash Royale for the USA clan, and two towers are already gone?
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.
Say what you will about Donald Trump, at least he's not Biden.
Joe Biden said he was going to a petting zoo.
Trump said schools are not petting zoos.
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason.
Trump and Biden didn’t get the memo.
I'm Joe Biden's husband.
Charlene's hairline was so big that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.
Why is Joe Biden afraid of getting COVID?
Because he'd lose his sense of smell.
Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!
President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎
Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.
What does Biden do? He does you.
What does do something useful unlike you?
A man dies and goes to Heaven. He sees a bunch of clocks and asks Jesus what they are for. He replied they are gauges, and that they move when people lie. He said that Mother Teresa's has moved twice, Abraham Lincoln's once, and George Washington's never.
The man asks to see the current president's, and Jesus just laughs and says that Joe Biden's is the one keeping the hurricanes to speed.
What's Joe Biden's favorite arcade game?
Space Invaders.
"Everyone knows I love kids better than people."
- Joe Biden. (A.K.A. Pedo Peter.)
Yo mama so ugly Joe Biden was jelly.
Hello my fellow Canadians, I mean Americans. I, your cool and hip president, has decided to give everyone free ice cream! Even the Russians. Go out to your local ice cream shop and make sure to leave your kids at home!
Government Briefing:
Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today…
…He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.