Beverage

Beverage jokes

Orphan

Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?

Teacher: What?

Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.

Teacher: Why water?

Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

Momma

Your momma so ugly, when the Kool-Aid man burst in the door, he said, "Oh no!"

Dad

My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."

Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.

Memes

Hipster

Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

He sipped his coffee before it was cool.

Alcohol

What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?

Tequila Mockingbird.

Job

I hate my job—all I do is crush cans all day. It’s soda pressing.

Pregnancy

What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?

Someone didn’t pull it out in time.

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson

What are Michael Jackson's favorite sodas? Yoo-hoo-hoo and Mountain Dew-hoo-hoo. What cola company should people get to keep him at bay? Pep-see-hee.

Drink

Michael Jackson

What kind of drinks does Michael Joseph Jackson like to drink? Boysenberry tea-hee-hee, and tea-hee-hee.

Breakfast

A pancake and an egg walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”

Orphan

Why do orphans dip their Oreos in water?

Because dad never came back with the milk.

Drink

A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"

Bar

A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.