Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water?
"Because his dad never brought the milk."
I like my girls like my coffee: Flat and white.
What goes in small and soft And comes out big and hard A tea bag
Why do ghosts go to bars?
For the boos!
What’s an orphan’s least favorite beverage? Milk.
Why does the orphan drink hot coco with water?
Because his dad never came back with the milk.
Your mama is so stupid, she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper.
What did the orphan say to his dad last?
Please get non-fat milk!
What's the difference between a glass of chocolate milk and a toddler?
The thing is, I wasn't arrested for throwing a glass of chocolate milk against the wall.
Why do orphans love drinking water? Because they have no milk to drink!
Are you a rope? Let's hang out by a tree and drink :)
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to climb Mt. Dew.
Friend: Slavery isn't good.
Other friend: Yeah, it's terrible.
Me: Shut up and get me a juice!
A priest, a rabbi and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”
A man walks into a bar carrying a big chunk of asphalt and says to the bartender, “Make mine a double Scotch and one more for the road.”
If a bird flies, and a duck can also run and fly, while a cat walks, why do we drink water?
How old do you have to be to drink? Any age.
Why do your orphans not drink beer?
Because last time they did, he went to suck some dudes' toes, then he tried to take him to his parents, but I guess that never happened.
A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"
Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?
Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.
