Best jokes
I was remembering the time when I lost my brother, only until I heard that hide and seek wasn't the best idea, especially in a secluded parking lot in downtown.
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-
When is the best time to go to the dentist?
2:30.
What do you call a country who needs another race just to be the best country in sports?
America.
What's the best way to find the Twin Towers?
Bucket.
Memes
Walt what?
Why is the wheel the best invention?
Because it's wheely wheely great!
What's the best name for a prostitute?
SI-MOAN.
A man finds out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees.
Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says, “I can save you $100!”
Sonic says... April 1st is the best day to do a school shooting. They will think it’s a joke! 😃
"In my opinion, JFK was the best president."
"Why?"
"He was very open-minded!"
What is the best way to catch a baby from falling off the roof?
With a pitchfork.
Where do you go to get the best fish?
A restaurant on the Titanic.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in and I'll tell ya.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
A man and a woman get married. The woman was a retired hooker. The man was a poet.
The man said as they did 69, "You taste better than my most delicious gourmet meal." The woman said, "Well, you aren’t too bad either, but the best 69 I’ve gotten and given was Harry. He did it for 24 hours nonstop." They got divorced that night.
What shoe shop would be a lesbian's best friend, decimen?
Why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? Because they had no one to pick them up.
What's an orphan's best friend? A boomerang because it's the only thing that ever came back.
I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.
Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.
I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.
What is the best la?
A koa-la!