Bars jokes

A guy walks into a bar with a 44 magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The guy behind the bar says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets!"

What do you call a bar run by Gungans?

Jar Jar Drinks.

What happens when a guy is in a pool with a deck and no one is around? The guy has to pee, get up on the deck, and stick it between the bars and pee.

A woman was sitting alone at a bar, and a man approached her. He asked her why she looked so sad. She responded that her boyfriend had just broken up with her because she was too kinky.

The man expressed his amazement when he admitted that his girlfriend had dumped him because of his fetishes. After a few drinks, they decided to go back to her place.

When they arrived, she told him to make himself comfortable while she freshened up. The man complied. After a long time, she burst open her bedroom door and said, "I hope you're ready!"

She stood in the doorway wearing a latex body suit and a gas mask. She had a whip in one hand, a flogger in the other hand, and a 12-inch strap-on dangling between her thighs.

The dude looked at her and said, "Thanks, but I'm good for the night!"

She said, "I thought you said that you were kinky."

The dude replied, "While you were in there, I f-cked your cat, pissed in your plants, and came on your curtains. It's been fun!"

A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "What, no soap?" Then he dies and she marries the barber.

So a man walks into the bar. The bartender looks to him and says, "You look like you're having a rough day, tell me about it?"

The man then stood up and became Mario!

A horse and a bear walk into a bar... Oh wait, can't tell that one!

A retard walks into a bar.

Bartender: Hey, retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard retard!

Thank you for listening to joke, sincerely - Jokeman87848584

Katsuki Bakugou went into a bar and said: "Where is that damn nerd?!?". Everyone was confused.

Bakugou says: "Tell me where Deku is or I'll kill you!" He kills them all because they all have green hair.

A man walks into a bar and see's a naked lady, "WOOW SHES HOT!" HE picks her up and pee's on her and says, "Hi lady lets have sex."

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a drink and a mop.

“Huh, I wonder why he needs a mop?”

One day me and my friend Howard the duck went into the bar. I ordered a drink. Howard told the waiter to put it on his... BILL.

During the election campaign of 2012, we heard about Obama, but we thought they said Osama. So I told my friend, "Grab his gun and let's have some fun." So during one of Obama's campaigns, we both shot him to death, which lasted a while.

Then my friend said, "Let's go get piss drunk at Mavericks bar." Then on TV they talked about Obama's death, and everybody but 2 guys cheered. Then guess what, we loaded our guns and lit those 2 guys up like we did to Obama.

A Jew and a Jew walk into a bar. The goy says, "What do you want?" The first Jew says, "Give it alcohol." The second Jew says, "My son ran away and became Christian." Another Jew pipes in, he says, "My son too!" The bartender turns around and says, "You're not going to believe this..."

How do rappers like their pizza?

With extra bars and dough!

A prostitute walks in the bar, and she goes up to the bartender and says, "I just made $100 and 5¢ sucking dick." The bartender says, "Who gave you the 5¢?" The prostitute says, "They all did!"

Past, present, and future walked into a bar... things got tense :). Pls send help, yet once again :).

Two men walk into a bar, and they both hit their heads.

A lovely and clean kebab restaurant with the option to sit at the bar, sit outside, or eat in.

Besides kebabs, they also offer other typical dishes, such as cholodki. They also have a selection of different pizzas. The photo shows various kebab dishes with potatoes, rice, and salad. This time, the rice is mixed with oats. Enjoy! The other two kebabs are also delicious, but I didn't try them. As always, I was treated very kindly, and the service and quality ensured that they were always happy to help.

As a foodie, I have to say that this is the best kebab restaurant. Next time, I'll try the pizza and come back again.

Three Jewish people walk into a bar.