A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form; Timo Werner still missed all the calls.
I told my friend to look at the clock then I said. " is this a bad time
Your hair line so bad we needed to pull it from another universes
I told someone some jokes y'know fruit ninja, barcode legs, french puppet thigh wrings. And she was like saying thats not cool and stuff. So she reported me and it was like. The counselor: So i've heard you've been making sh jokes? Me: You say it like it's a bad thing Her: It is Me: chill bro it aint that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)
schools be like "dRuGS arE BaD" then prescribe a 6-year-old Adderall for not wanting to sit in the same spot for 8 hours
Johnny is very attached to his parents, he asks to take a shower with her when she gets in. He looks down and asks "whats that?"The mother replies "that's my garage" he looks up and asks what are those? The mother responds "those are my headlights." He then goes and takes a shower with his dad. He looks down "daddy whats that?" The dad replies "that's my car." He goes to sleep that night and wakes up because of a bad dream. He goes and tell his mother and she says "you can lay with me." He falls fast asleep then wakes up once more because of falling off the bed he gets back up and gets under the covers. Then he feels the bed moving he looks under the covers to investigate and see's them going at it he then yells "mommy turn on you're headlights daddy's parking his car in you're garage!" *THUD*
Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon...
He'd always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!
Yo hairline i so bad when you look in the mirror yo hairline looks like an endangered specie
This is a joke to tell to someone with you or something, SOMEONE will laugh. Say: This word isnt gonna be funny until i tell you, your probably not going to laugh. *your friend* whats the word? *you* finger *friend* *dies of laughter*. *note* it works better if you wiggle your finger or something before and not every one laughs, so dont feel bad if they dont. Also dont be surprized if you get put in jail for murder, because your going to kill someone with this.
People say rape is bad, it is because I don't want STD and HIV
U know what you could use a orphan as a punching bad ............ what are they gunna do tell their parents
Why are Cheetahs bad at running away. They always get spotted
Ok now I'm not good at telling jokes but this 1 is not to bad 1 cunt said to anothrr cunt do you get cold at night fuck no cunt the 1 st cunt said why I have a built in set of verticlal currains to keep the cold out cunt xx
A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.
"Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.
"Denise."
"That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"
"Tom Junior."
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades and they will stop."
i work on medicine my jod is to smell it to see if its bad :)
Why did Hitler's cookies taste bad? He forgot to clean out the oven.
My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sisters knickers the other day, it wouldn’t of been so bad but she’s was wearing them at the time, it made the rest of the funeral so awkward
Did you know the giraffe’s hooves are the size of dinner plates? Too bad they would have nothing to put on them!
