Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was "Raraaaughhaugh".
There were these two guys in a lunatic asylum... and one night, one night they decide they don't like living in an asylum any more. They decide they're going to escape! So, like, they get up onto the roof, and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moon light... stretching away to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem. But his friend, his friend didn't dare make the leap. Y'see... Y'see, he's afraid of falling. So then, the first guy has an idea... He says 'Hey! I have my flashlight with me! I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me!' B-but the second guy just shakes his head. He suh-says... He says 'Wh-what do you think I am? Crazy? You'd turn it off when I was half way across!”
I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day... Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away... I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand... When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.
jiggle balls jiggle balls jiggle all the way dr squatch will heal the itch and know it goes away hey
Why did naruto run fast?? Because he tried to get away from himself
Bf:babe do you love me? Gf:of course,why do you ask? bf:i heard that your mom passed away and i went to pick some roses for you to try to cheer you up and then i remembered why i went to the garden
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.
Your hairline so far back even shaggy and scooby ran away
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So I took away his towers and he took away my queen.
Dating in your 30s is like looking for a parking spot...... The good ones are all taken. The rest are either handicapped or too far away.
Yo mamma so fat when she tried to sit down the chair ran away
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Your so ugly ypur hairline ran away
I went to a tall girl and i asked her ̈ what do you do for a living? ̈ she says ̈ an account. ̈ so i reply with ̈ an accounting the hairs on peoples heads. ̈ and then i run away
Why did the orphan run away?
They Wanted To Go Home
Why did the homophobic boy get fired from the banana factory???? He kept throwing away the bent ones!!
you and your sister always get into a fight a she says "i dont care" then you say right away "about you"
Your Hairline is so far away that Jesus could've see when he was on the cross
