Aviation

Aviation jokes

Plane

Why was I angry on my plane? Because I read these stupid 9/11 jokes.

Plane

A twin engine has two engines.

If one engine stops, the other will have just enough power to get the plane to the scene of the accident.

Parachute

Why did the parachute refuse to open?

Because it had a "fatal attraction" to the ground.

Head

Why did two red heads fall off the plane? Because they were so damn blind.

Bee

According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Coming!

Hang on a second.

Hello?

- Barry? - Adam?

- Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.

Looking sharp.

Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.

Sorry. I'm excited.

Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.

A perfect report card, all B's.

Very proud.

Ma! I got a thing going here.

- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!

- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!

Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!

Pilot

My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).

So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."

9/11

I joke about 9/11 because if I did it, it would have a tendency to crash and burn.

Plane

Why are planes the fastest readers? Because they went through 100 stories in 20 seconds.

Plane

I farted, try me. You farted? Oh no, we all farted.

The plane crashed, but I did too on a pillow.

Tower

Why is everyone trying to make a big deal out of this? My family were only flying to Pakistan and crashed into 2 towers.