Aviation Jokes

According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Ooming!

Hang on a second.

Hello?

- Barry? - Adam?

- Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.

Looking sharp.

Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.

Sorry. I'm excited.

Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.

A perfect report card, all B's.

Very proud.

Ma! I got a thing going here.

- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!

- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!

Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!

Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.

Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱

What did the airplane say to the paper plane? Why do you look like a wimp?

Sally jumped out a plane, she forgot her parachute!

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not Sally...

How did she die?

A bomb came down whilst falling through the sky.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

A bomb.

I don't like 9/11 jokes because they always talk about how bad of a plane driver my dad is

How do you make a baby astronaut sleep?

You rock-it!

What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?

Ask Boeing.

Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!

Everyone: What does NASA mean?

NASA's response: National Aeronautics and Space Administration.

Everyone: What does NASA mean?

Arinator's response: National Ariana and Space Ariana.

What is Osama bin Laden's favorite football team?

The New York Jets.

I told my friend to fly a plane,

But he threw a ramp off a roof.

Why were the people in the Twin Towers sad?

They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.

So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co-pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot.

Then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"

I don’t make 9/11 jokes they have a tendency to crash and burn

People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.

A blonde crashed a helicopter. A police officer asked her what happened. She says, "It got cold so I turned off the fan."

Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.

My great grandfather died in 9/11.

He was an amazing pilot.

I'd make 9/11 jokes, but they'd just crash and burn.

Q: What do Mexicans love to wear in the air force?

A: Air Force Juans.