Astronomy jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she went swimming, they found water on Mars!
Your mama's so fat that when she went to space, there was no space left.
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket!
Yo mama so fat, when she sits down she dislocates Earth out of its orbit.
NASA called me and they said they reached your hairline.
Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈
I said "Uranus!" and the girl beside me face-palmed. I wonder what I did wrong?
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.
My uncles like the moon.
He comes out at night.
Yo hairline so ugly, it looks like a newfound constellation.
Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter!
Why does Saturn have a ring?
Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.
Why is Saturn richer than other planets?
It has a ring!
*trigger alert*
Why did the racist cop shut down the space brothel?
Because there were too many black holes.
Yo mama so fat, she orbits the sun!
I can't wait to see Uranus! 😂
Which planet would I consider dating?
I don’t know, but not Saturn because she’s already got a ring on her.
Why doesn’t the sun ☀️ go to college?
Because it has a million degrees.
What is an astronaut's favorite part of a keyboard?
The SPACE BAR!