I was playing basketball and a guy in a wheelchair asked if he could play.
I looked at him and told him that we are looking for ankle breakers, yours are already broken.
Asked Jokes
A kid was asking a mother for money.
Mother: Sorry, I don't have money.
The kid kept asking the mother for money.
Mother: I already told you I don't have money.
The kid (the middle child): I'm your fucking child!
"I was walking in the yard yesterday and a bug stepped on me. Why, you ask? Because the bug didn't know I was there."
What does pussy taste like in chocolate cream pie?
Don't ever ask me no damn question like that. I ain't never had no damn chocolate cream pie, you crazy?
A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious. He ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over. They asked what happened, and the German soldier said, "Hail hit her."
How's your day going?
Shut up, I didn't ask.
Use code tiko#teamfish
One day I was working at the bank, doing my job. Then suddenly a woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. Then I told her that her balance is un-balanced.
How do you get Dick from Richard?
You ask nicely.
One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop.
The man asked for some crack.
The woman turned around and said, "Here."
That's where the crack was, you guessed it.
The next day, she wiped it clean, ready for the next guest who "wanted crack."
My grandpa asked me to pass him his phone, but I passed him a calculator. He couldn't tell the difference.
Yo mama's so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he asked her to move out of the way.
I aced my poker test...
My teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...
A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffin...
Do you get my puns? No, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...
So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.
Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"
Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."
When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.
I ask my sister why the Chinese owner brings us free food all the time.
My sister said to me "I love him long time."
You are so ugly, when you were born, your mother asked for a receipt.
A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."
My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets!"
What is one question on a tech test you should always ask before getting down?
What in the Robot!?
