Asked jokes
Yo mama so stupid, she asks for the restroom on Amazon.
A gingerbread man walks into the doctor’s office with a broken arm. He asks the doctor, “Doc, what should I do? My arm is broken!”
The doctor then looks at him and says, “Have you tried icing?”
My pp was in the Guinness World Record book.
The librarian then asked me to take it out.
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Are there any girls here?”
The bartender says, “No, only women.”
The man then leaves.
What did the booty say when it was asked to help?
"I've got your backside covered!"
I asked God why nobody likes me. He showed a reflection of myself.
Teacher: "Hey, James, this is the third time I asked you a question!"
James: "But you told me not to answer you back!"
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
I asked my mother about her mom.
She said she was in a better place. After that, I asked her where that place is. She didn't know, so I sent her to a better place.
An Asian walked up to another Asian that was crying.
He asked, "Is somting wong?"
The other guy says, "I was i a noh paking zon."
My gf told me she was pregnant. So I punched her in the stomach.
She asked me "Why the hell did you do that?!?!?" "I wanted to let you know I'm pro abortion."
One thing you can ask Mario:
"Can you jump up and down for me?"
I went to the store and I saw no oranges, and I went to ask the cashier:
"Cashier: Which one?"
I was at my lecture at Oxford. Professor Albert Pessistein was leading the lecture, teaching us new equations. I asked where I can find a drink, due to my dying of thirst. He said, “big games my friend.”
He then proceeded to teach us, “The greater the Big games, the higher the Bottling!”
I asked my dad what his previous job was. He said: "I was a post until I met your mother."
A polar bear walks into a bar, asks the barman, “A pint of lager................. and a packet of crisps.”
The barman asks, “Why the large pause?”
A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.
He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.
My sister asked where is my book.... me: "itti badi nak hai gufa jaisi dhund us mei."
They asked JFK Jr. if he wanted to shower before his flight. He said, "No, I'll just wash up on shore!"
I asked my nan if she wouldn't mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping. She replied, "Why the fuck would I want to sit in a bucket?" So eventually she did, and I took the best shit I have ever had!