Arrest jokes
A shoplifter tried to rob a grocery store.
He was asked to give an "eggsplanation."
One day, a snail got robbed by two turtles. Once the cops arrived and asked what had happened, the snail said, "I don't know, it all happened too fast!"
Why did the baseball player get arrested? He tried to steal third.
Why was the Human Torch arrested?
He had firearms.
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.
Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
For fingering a minor.
A cop pulls a guy over for suspected drunk driving. The cop opens the door and the driver falls out onto the asphalt. The cop says, "Holy shit, you're so drunk, you can't even walk!"
The drunk says, "No shit, that's why I took my car!"