Ares jokes

There are two types of people, avoid them both.

Doctor: I have bad news.

Man: What?

Doctor: There are two things wrong with you. First, you have cancer.

Man: Oh, no...

Doctor: Second, you have Alzheimer's.

Man: Well, at least I don't have cancer!

Why do orphans hate big bags of chips?

Because they are family sized :,)

You are so poor, when I pass you, you ask for spare change, and I was poor, too.

Orphans are so useless even their parents agree.

Hi, are you even my sister?

Yes, I am.

No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.

It's not bad that my car doesn't beep when reversing.

The screams of the passers-by are enough for me!

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they can't go home.

Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.

Orphans are banned in Alabama.

Are you serious right now, bro?

Orphan: I’m gonna tell my parents!

Me: Where are they?

Orphan: ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄

"My parents are dead, lol," said the orphan.

The man told the women, “Roses are red, violets are blue, you suck cock and you enjoy it too.”

Then she said that's true.

This is just a bad emo pickup line, lmao.

Are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in!

Sup guys, how are you?

Man, I am jealous of the victims of 9/11. They are the fastest readers, who went through 87 stories in 8 seconds.

What do you do when you are angry with an orphan? Hit them.

It's not like they can tell their parents.

So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"

Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"

Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"

What type of movies are orphans not allowed to watch?

PG movies.