Ares jokes
What does an orphan not have in common with criminals?
Criminals are wanted.
Sometimes I am happy, and there are times I envy my dog.
Are you a rope? Because I want to hang sometimes.
Why are basketball courts slippery?
Because the players dribble on it.
Are there support groups for men?
Sonic says if you're ever born, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
My friend’s neighbor’s house is a real pigsty. There are hogs everywhere wearing neck garments.
Boyfriend: "Babe, are you traffic police?"
Girlfriend: "No."
Boyfriend: "Then why do you shout at me for not wearing a helmet?"
Basketballs are bigger than end.
Why are orphans bad at Yahtzee?
Because they don't know what a full house is :(
If you’re American when you go in the bathroom...
... and American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What are three things the Twin Towers have in common with my dad? They are big, sexy, and smashed your mom.
Why are the two friends like the Twin Towers?
They fell apart.
Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)
Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.
Is it still called beef if two vegetarians are arguing?
Why are bears' hair so sticky?
Because they use honeycombs.
Let's go punch some orphans, who are they gonna tell, their parents? 🤣🤣🤣
One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."
His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."
Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"