Ares jokes

Abortion is wrong because God wanted the baby to be alive.

Miscarriages are okay because God did not want the baby to be alive.

I saw this kid sitting on the sidewalk and asked him where are his parents?

I love working at an orphanage.

What is hard about having a relationship with an astronaut?

They are always so distant! :-]

Papyrus: HUMAN, WHY ARE YOU SAD?

Me: I'm just BONELY.

Sans: Good one kiddo.

I love telling jokes about orphans.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Orphan: What are you doing tonight?

Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.

Hello, I am Sflugo. I am opening the Pro Orphan Joke Club because a lot of people are saying to get rid of them, but we say NO! If you want to join, comment and say, "#SaveOrphanJokes."

What is the best thing about being an orphan?

All bags of chips are family-sized!

We are always joking around about being adopted, when really we are still living in the orphanage.

You are all going to be pun-ished!

My friend got a sorry excuse for a new hair style, she says "How do you like my new hair style?"

Me: I think it's a great idea, when are you getting one?

Why are orphans rude at school?

What's the school going to do? Call their parents?

What did one cow say to the other? You are mootiful!

Did y’all hear about the increasing divorce rate because people are addicted to Fortnite?

They’re just two weeks to quit.

Joke: Genders are much like the twin towers. They used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.

Dark jokes are like kids with cancer, They never get old.

A man was kneeling on the church floor, crying desperately in front of the large wooden statue of Christ.

"My headphones are broken, Lord... I'm desperate... What should I do? Guide me!"

And the Lord appeared in the form of bright light, and the strong, deep voice filled the man's soul.

"WELL BUY NEW ONES, YOU DUMBASS!"

And so he did.

There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"

The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."

The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”

If you are depressed, eat Panera Bread. It is so yummy yum yyum yum yum yum.

Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.

Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.

I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the bottom of my heart.

A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”

He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”

He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”

“No, this is the rink manager!”