Ares jokes
Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you! 😫
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
Why are most vacuums gay?
They’re always coming out of the closet.
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin, and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?
A black guy.
*Side eye*
Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?
Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.
A Biologist, a Chemist, and a Statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left.
The chemist shoots at the same deer and misses five feet to the right.
The statistician shouts, "We got him!"
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why are Americans so good at Rubik's Cubes?
They are skilled at separating colors.
Your teeth are so yellow, you spit butter!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers and the middle one's for you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, get the f*ck out, I’m trying to poo!
What foods are orphans allergic to? Homemade food.
Roses are red,
Potatoes are brown,
Your mom's so hot,
I put her down.
Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.
School Rizz:
You are my exam. I am always thinking about you but never making a move.
What is a orphan's favorite song?
"We Are Family."
What time are most dentist appointments? Tooth hurty.