Ares jokes

An American and a Russian are talking. The American says, "We in America have the best democracy. We can stand in front of the White House and shout with impunity: \"The American President is a moron!\""

"We can do that too," says the Russian, walking with the American to the Kremlin and shouting: "The American President is a moron!"

What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?

With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.

Are you the Twin Towers? Because I'd smash.

They are making new versions of the Star Wars films. The names have only just come out.

There is Star Wars: Attack of the Trannies, Star Wars: The Trannie Awakens, Star Wars: Rogue Trannie, Star Wars: The LGBTQ Strikes Back, and then there is Star Wars: The Last Straight Man.

So the other day my black friend and I were working on a group project. He was so slow so I whipped him to make him faster.

Are you the voices I've been hearing?

Because I can't seem to get you out of my head. (Schizophrenic RIZZ)

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they can’t find home.

Q: Why are medication pills white?

A: Because they work.

People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.

Why are Americans bad at chess? They lost their towers.

Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.

me: calls suicide hotline. hotline lady: suicide hotline, how are you doing today? me: not much, just hanging.

What do my mom and a basketball have in common?

My mom's tits and ass are bouncy, just like a basketball.

You are playing as Ukraine in Military Tycoon, and then someone kills you. You see who killed you in nuke revenge, and it says "Putinmoserfucer2342."

Why are orphans so good at tennis?

They never get love.

Ben 10 and a disabled person are the same, but no aliens for the disabled person.

Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.

I just got my COVID vaccine, and this lady said, "You have no idea what you put in your body." I said, "Yet you are eating chorizo."

What's the problem with 9/11 jokes?

They are just two plane.

Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.