Appearance jokes
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
Yo momma's so ugly that when she walked into a Haunted Mansion, she walked back out with a job application.
I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.
Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.
Your wife dumped you because you are so poor and you are so ugly. You also live under a rock and have no money. You got dumped so hard you can't remember you got dumped.
Your hairline goes so far back you can see a full world scale map in your forehead reflection.
You're so ugly, even a Snapchat filter can't fix it.
Your forehead is so big, you think in 4K.
Your hairline dates so far back like when your dad left.
When I feel ugly, I just look at my brother and get over it.
My grandpa and your hairline go way back.
You're so ugly!
Kris looks like a Neanderthal. The only difference is that Neanderthals serve a purpose in HUMAN HISTORY.
I love your hair today.
How did you get it to come out your nose like that?
Yo forehead so large, it has its own gravitational pull.
Yo mama is so ugly, Bob the Builder said, "I can't fix you!"
James Charles is more straight than your hairline.
You're so bald that when you wear a poncho, you look like a broken condom.
You're so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.
Your hairline is so bad man, I gave your doctor a breathalyzer.