Appearance jokes

Your hairline sucks; even Harry Potter could not put it under a spell to turn it back to order.

Your forehead is so big that the teachers use it as a whiteboard.

Your hairline bent like the relationship with your mom and dad.

Marleigh is so fat and ugly.

Yo mama's so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.

Yo momma's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter.

Yo mama so ugly, that when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho- HOLY SHIT!"

Yo, hairline goes farther back than the Big Bang theory!

Your hairline is so bad, it's not even McDonald's, it's Dixy Chicken!

You look so pretty. Not at all gross today.

I’d roast you, but your mirror does that for me every day.

Bro, yo goofy ahh hairline lookin' like a rhombicosidodecahedron.

Yo hairline so ugly, it looks like a newfound constellation.

Fat people should expect big things when they take their shirt off.

My friend texted me and asked me, "Hey. What's your favorite emoji?"

I said, "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬"

She said, "Why?"

I said, "'Cause it's your twin."

Yo mama is so ugly Bob the Builder said, "I can't fix that!"

I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

All dumbs aren't blonde.

Mom: That's why your dad left you.

Me: Why?

Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.

Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!

Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!

(This actually did happen in real life.)

You have gaps in your teeth, looks like your tongue is in jail.