Anyone know how to get an A on the "An Inspector Calls" section of the GCSE paper?
Why did Steven hawking have no friends?
He couldn’t stand anyone...
A man looks at his friend and says, "If you and a friend go camping and you two get really drunk, and in the morning you wake up with a condom in your butt, would you tell anyone?" The friend says in a disgusted tone, "No." So the man says, "Okay, let's go camping."
So we were working with a new client at work, and my boss farts. He said, "A little gas never killed anyone."
One day a teacher stands up in front of her class and asks if anyone in the class is an idiot, and says that if there is one, then he/she should stand up.
After a minute, a boy stands up.
The teacher then asks the boy if he actually thinks he's an idiot.
The boy says, "No, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself."
What do you call a gun that doesn't kill anyone?
- A VEGUN.
What to do you do after you rape a deaf girl? Cut off her fingers so she can't tell anyone.
Why didn't anyone react when the king farted? -- It was a noble gas.
Why didn't anyone care about the circus?
Because it was irr-elephant.
