ANS jokes
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
I went over to a crying child and said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at an orphanage!
What do you call an Asian telephone?
Ling Ling.
Yo mama so ugly, when she tried to enter an ugly contest, they said they didn't allow professionals.
I tried to give directions to an orphan, but he got lost because there was no home.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a cutting board?
Why does an orphan always get out in baseball?
Because he can't run home.
What do you call an 18 year old orphan?
Homeless.
I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.
Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”
My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.
Satanism is such an ugly word. I prefer the term, "red skin appreciation."
It's opposite day today. I'm gonna tell an orphan that their parents are here.
What store does an orphan hate?
Family Tree.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.
Are you depressed? Go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?... one gets picked.
Why can't an orphan play baseball or softball?
They can't find home. 🤣
You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!
How to make an orphan's hands hurt: Make them clap their hands till their parents come back.