ANS jokes
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
Someone who COUNTS BARS all day!
Yo mama so fat!
She sunk the Titanic. She put on a blue coat and they thought she was an iceberg!
If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?
People actually have a use for one of them.
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
fr tho
What do Spiderman and an orphan have in common? They both have no way home.
Today I saw a little boy wearing rags sitting on a curb. I said, "Awww, are you an orphan?" He said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What's an orphan's least favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop.
The man asked for some crack.
The woman turned around and said, "Here."
That's where the crack was, you guessed it.
The next day, she wiped it clean, ready for the next guest who "wanted crack."
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
What’s the difference between a leaf and an emo kid falling out of a tree? The leaf reaches the ground.
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?
Slick her hair back, she looks 15.
Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher asked, "How many of you guys are Trump fans?" Since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands, well, except Little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "Why are you being different again, Johnny?" So Little Johnny says, "Well, because I'm a Democrat. My mom is a Democrat, and my dad is a Democrat, so I'm a Democrat!" So then the teacher responds with, "Well, what if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Well, Little Johnny says, "A Trump fan!"
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
What instrument can a skeleton not play? An organ!
What instrument can a skeleton play? A Trombone!
What does an orphan call a family portrait?
A selfie.
An LDS preacher knocks on the door with a chalice of wine offering to do the sacrament.
The person living there points and says, "Begone, foul blood-drinker!"
And promptly the preacher bursts into flames, leaving nothing but ash.