And jokes
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
What's a footlong and slippery?
A slipper.
I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.
When the quiet kid gets angry and the sped kid sees your hiding spot.
Bing, bang, boom!
If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
Memes
If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
Who's the Roblox YouTuber that always sees Among Us and says "stupid"?
My son came up to me and said, "Mom, where are your parents?"
I stared in confusion. I said, "In a far place."
He asked, "In an orphanage?"
What do the Twin Towers and my ad's condom both have in common?
They both broke and everybody cried.
The fries were the slowest in the race and they said, "We need to ketchup to the tomato!"
Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?
It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.
I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.
What's the same about a newborn and a football?
You can kick them both very easily.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
In the hospital, they need to keep the disabled patients' rooms cooler than the other patients' rooms.
Why?
They need to keep the vegetables cool and crisp.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
What does Michael Jackson and a TV have in common? They both get turned on by kids.
I chucked a lamp and a depressed kid, hoping it would brighten up his day.
What do orphans and police not have in common?
The police can actually go home.