Allegation jokes

Why did Michael Jackson allow little boys to sleep in his house? Because he's bad.

What's the quickest way to get money besides winning the lottery?

Leaving your son with Michael Jackson.

What do you call a lamp that molests young boys? A Jacko Lantern!

What's in common with Michael Jackson and a phone?

Kids play with both of them.

What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple? You never see a pimple come on a little boy’s face.

Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.

I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!

"Everyone knows I love kids better than people."

- Joe Biden. (A.K.A. Pedo Peter.)

What did the woman say to Michael Jackson at the beach?

"Excuse me, sir, you're in my son."

What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?

How do you verify a rape claim? You make it true, and then the person is a victim for sure.

I can do a very good Michael Jackson impersonation. I just need a kid who can keep a secret.

I was watching a documentary about how storks carry babies from their previous life to the next.

In his old life, Michael Jackson must’ve been a teddy bear. The storks let him play with kids for a change.

Why did Michael Jackson go to the movies? He saw there was minor nudity.

So, I met Michael Jackson before he died. He dragged me to his bed.

What does Michael Jackson and a lion have in common?

They're both predators.

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common? They both let little kids sit on their lap.

Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.

Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.

What is the fastest thing in the world?

James Charles when he sees little boys.

"Hee hee touched me."