Why don't Amish people water ski?
Because their horses would drown.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
What do cows use to do their homework? A cowculator.
American: How do you use a PC?
Amish: We use a potato.
Why can't you tell a joke in a corn maze?
Because there's too many ears.
What did mama cow say to baby cow? -- "It's pasture bedtime."
What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
The chicken!
What do you get when you cross a cow with a coffee bean grower?
De-calf!
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
A momma cow and three baby calves are on a farm. The first baby calf asks the momma cow, "Mom, why is my name Rose?"
The mom responded, "Well, you see, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."
The second one asks her, "Then why is my name Daisy?"
The mom chuckled and simply replied with, "When you were born, Daisy petals fell on your head."
The last one said, "DUH DUR SURH!"
The mom said, "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!"
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?
What's the difference between a cow and a pig?
One is a pig.
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?
High steaks gambling.
What are cow jokes considered?
Cheesy.
Why did the cow wiggle?
To make milkshake! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
What do you call a cow's facial hair?
A moostache.
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."
