Agriculture jokes
How does white people's backyard look like? Cotton field!
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
American: How do you use a PC?
Amish: We use a potato.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
How can you find out how old a cabbage is?
By looking at its cabbAGE.
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
“Hi Mom!”
What do you call a cow that eats grass?
A lawn mooer.
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean beef.
What stresses a baby strawberry out?
When its mom is in a jam.
Two cows were hiding.
One said: "Moooo."
The other one said: "Shut up! We're hiding!"
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To wipe the chicken's ass!
Hi, this is Chloe, and I am about to tell you about my joke.
Why did the cow cross the road? Because to get to the other side.
What is long, hard, and has cum in it?
A cucumber.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
A man opened a snail farm.
He said that it is a slow-moving business.
One cow asks another cow, "Are you afraid of mad cow disease?"
The other cow says, "Why should I be? I'm a helicopter."
What do cows use to do their homework? A cowculator.
What did the cow say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"
What did the grape say when the fox stepped on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.