What do you call a united cow?
United Steaks.
(There was a mommy tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato.)
Baby: Wait for me!
(Father tomato walks back toward the baby.)
(He squishes the child.)
Father: Ketchup!
What happened when the corn got scolded? He got an earful!
I wish 9/11 was in December because the poor farm fields.
What do you call a cowboy with Down syndrome? A whipped potato.
how to solve world hunger and over population?
Cannibalism.
There's an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.
I hope my teacher will be ok.
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
One gets picked.
Two cows are grazing in a field.
One cow says to the other, "You ever worry about that mad cow disease?"
The other cow says, "Why would I care? I'm a helicopter!"
My girlfriend is growing watermelons, not in the ground though (we had fun that night)!
Uranus is a cow, You may be wondering, how?
Uranus farts methane, And cows do the same.
Why are bees' hair sticky?
Because they use honeycombs!
My brother eats water from the pig factory at 1:00 a.m., and blames a deaf kid, so he ended up going to solitary.
Why do orphans sit in apple trees?
They wait to be picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One's actually picked.
A farmer artificially impregnated a cow. The cow said to another cow, "It's a miracle, I'm pregnant." The other cow said, "That's impossible, it's only us cows in the field, you must be joking." The first cow said, "Nope, I'm serious... no bull!"
Why did the cow knock over Johnny?
Because the cow felt like to dumb.
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
What goes oOoOo on your breath that scared away the animals from the farm?
