Aed jokes

What is 6 inches and has nuts?

A Snickers bar.

I met a homeless guy named Rich.

He wasn't.

I have a green ball in one hand and one in the other. What am I holding?

Shrek's dick.

I was going to tell a joke about a mirror, but it seems that I'm looking at one.

I heard China aborts 25% of female babies. That's a lot of dead 3-year-old gender-affirmed girls.

Guys, this is so disrespectful, I love Jesus. I go to church every Tuesday morning to give Jesus a... giffffffft.

So disrespectful guys. #jesusismyhubby

No one gives a fuck.

My wife is pregnant with a 3-year-old, so I gave her medicine, but now she’s pregnant with a 5-year-old.

What has 148 teeth and🥴🥴 holding back a monster? My zipper.

What's up?

A rocket from NASA.

OMG SO FUNNYY!

If you buy two condoms, but you're banging a woman, it's fine, don't throw it away, just make her transgender.

I dunno man, worked for me.

You can't send an Indian to walk a corner. The only corner they will get to is 7-11.

I killed a homeless dude, now she's at the funeral home. 😭💔

What do you call a car on the side of the road, lit up and ablaze?

Paul Walker's death.

Little Red Riding Hood says to the wolf: "What a big dick you have!"

Wolf: "The better to f*** you with!"

"Hey, is that a peach?"

*gets slapped on the butt*

"Noted."

My girlfriend asked for a kiss, so I gave her my dick.

During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.

He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*

Yo, hairline is a distraction to my barber because he wanna fix it so bad (because of how bad it looks).

The best part about being a medical student is, you will never run out of jokes.