Aed jokes
If a midget says your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?
What does a slave owner use to buy slaves? A Master Card.
What do bungee jumping and a gay man have in common?
If the rubber breaks, they're in beep shit.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
I'm okay with giving babies iPads, as long as the baby has anencephaly.
You can't get brain rot if you don't have a brain!
A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.
"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"
"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."
What do you call lesbian twins?
Lick-A-Likes.
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One’s a Good Year, the other’s a great year.
What’s one thing a man can do that a woman can’t?
Sit down and shut up.
What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?
A margarita hits the spot every time.
What’s a reverse exorcism?
It’s when the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A liqueur cabinet.
What do you call a group of black people in a shed?
Antique farm equipment.
My husband told me he just came into a lot of money.
Weird, he usually uses a sock.
What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?
A margarita hits the spot every time.
What do you call a homosexual wrestler?
Gay Mysterio.
When a deaf girl master baits, does she use the other hand to moan?
A man asks God, "Hello God, why did you make my wife so dumb?"
God replies, "So she would love you..."
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
How did the person feel when his partner wouldn't perform a golden shower on him? Pissed off.