Aed jokes
People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"
And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
What's the difference between a frog and a skyscraper? The frog can jump. Hahahahaha!
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
Yo mama has such a big forehead, she is the CEO of foreheads!
Your mom should show you your real home. The trash!
If death was an option for a look, you could be the first.
Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.
Boy: Knock knock.
Girl: ...Who's there?
Boy: Not your parents!
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Your fat ass mom.
Teacher: We have a new student. He's an orphan.
Student: Oof.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Student: His parents.
Why do orphans play Minecraft? Because they have no home.
Why did the boy ask a question to the girl?
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.
Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.
Mineta: ...go on...
Denki: Ochako's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it?
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: *cries T_T*
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair. 😎
I was talking to my friend, and he said, "I lost my virginity to a girl, and then she stopped coming to school." And I said, "Probably because she was fired."
What do a gay guy in a wheelchair and a tomato have in common?
They’re both a fruit AND a vegetable!
What's the difference between a phone and a girl? You can turn it off whenever you want.
My favorite species is a cheetah because
Ima cheet-ah on the test.
My sister said I'm stupid and I'm a baby, and I said, "Oh, I didn't know we were talking about you."
What animal can't you trust with your homework?
A: A cheetah!