Abuse jokes
I can't sit down anymore... My dad went too far this time.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and a pedophile? There isn't a difference.
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
This is not a joke, but if your uncle tells you, "Bend over, touch your toes, I'll show you where the monster goes," don't do it, hehehehehe.
You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!
Memes
Yo mama so short, when she tried sniffing cocaine, she couldn’t get high.
Sippin' on promethazine With lean, I fell in love.
I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup.
Why do I call my priest daddy?
Because he raped my mom when she was 13. She's 27 now.
Why do Catholic priests suck on the cock of a young boy in his parish?
Because it tastes like a Vienna sausage.
If you punch an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What kind of file turns a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole?
A pedophile.
Watching "50 Shades of Grey" was more painful than my uncle fisting me as a kid.
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
*The doctor asking why I've broken 19 bones in the past week*
*My abusive mum- Go on, tell him!*
Well what am I gonna do now...
My dad hits me :(
What is a nonce's favorite toy...? You.
What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.
My mum touched my friend, but she wasn’t the she’s only 12.
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
Rape jokes aren’t funny. People like me that are actually victims of rape are triggered by them.