I was going to tell a ghost joke, but it just seemed so mean-spirited.
Simone
Q. What's the difference between Donald Trump and orange Jello?
A. The Jello has a higher IQ.
If a Jewish kid has ADHD, do they get sent to a concentration camp?
I hope you're an organ donor so your organs can go to someone who deserves them.
Today I was asked if I was in favor of legalizing prostitution.
I admit I haven't given it much of a thot.
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
Did you hear about the bull who went on a shooting rampage?
I guess he was a little deranged.
Political correctness has gone too far! You have to say "cognitive decline" rather than "Alzheimer's ridden shitbag"!
Trump should be grateful for DEI.
How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?
My first thought when I read Betty Pear's obituary was, "Thank God for Alzheimer's!"
If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.
They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.
Apparently there was a woman from Australia who had sex with 500 men in one day.
That's like a real life "Your mom" joke.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
I was going to make a bulimia joke, but suddenly it just felt so empty.
Tonight, I picked up an anorexic prostitute.
It was really easy because she was only about 90 pounds.
Dog toys are getting out of control.
My mum's dog has a round bison bone.
Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.
I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?